I'M HANDICAPPED BY A BROKEN ARM, AND I'M NO CHRISTY BROWN. I write less when I'm forced to do it with one finger on my left hand. My shrink and I agree that I have this long habit of putting myself down, and feeling like, IF I DON'T DO STUFF TO EARN MY WORTH THEN I FEEL LIKE I HAVE NO WORTH.
I know the actions that counter these distorted beliefs, but I don't use what I know.
My shrink asked me if I want to change, or would I rather live out my days nestled into this warm blanket of self-deprecation?
I didn't come back with statements like, OH, NO, I WANT TO CHANGE.
IF i AM UNWILLING TO CHANGE THEN WHY SHOULD i KEEP SEEING A SHRINK? If I'm unwilling to change then why would a shrink be willing to keep seeing me? If I discover who I am and I'm broken, then what?
